No-vember Intentions: Say No
Are you saying yes to things that are distracting you from your goals?
Consider saying no during No-vember!
But first, let’s check in on last month. How was your October? Did you do anything scary/outside your comfort zone?
Last month I benefited from tracking my growth zone activities. Below are a few things I did:
Made and went to several doctors’ appointments
Packed for two trips with a more flexible mindset (less anxiety - packing is tough for some of us with ADHD)
Went to a celebration of life with colleagues I hadn’t seen in 15 years
Managed pain - worked on stretching and trying to rest
I noticed that I get frustrated/angry faster when I’m already anxious, so I worked on noticing/acknowledging it.
I am also faster at not being my core self when I’m overscheduled. Yes, after 20+ years, I’m finally ready to admit it.
So, this month my plan is to work on saying No.
To start, I am exploring saying no to two types of things.
Myself. I make extra work for myself. I do things for people they don't ask for, I focus on details others don't care about, and I care too much about things I can't control.
Others. I want to help and can put others first.
The first step in being able to say no is to be clear about your goals for the month. Take a moment to think about a few things you want to accomplish. I like to choose things that will help different areas of my life, and mine are:
Wrap up my ORSC Worldwork project (create the November presentation, the final presentation, and a draft for the December wrap up)
Improve wellness (continue to stretch, lift, do cardio, and do weight-bearing activities)
Read/learn (IFS videos, fiction for fun, and one non-fiction book)
Enjoy family/friends/puppy
My goals are big, and I plan to focus on how every time I say yes to something that doesn’t align with my goals, I’m saying no to my goals.
I’m excited to see if reminding myself of my goals and making decisions to align with them will make them easier to accomplish.
What do you want to accomplish in November?
How could focusing on your goals and saying no to something every day help you?
Below is an example log. Clicking on it will give you access to an 8.5”x11” PDF log for printing that isn’t as dark.
In the image above I have filled in my goals for the month (project, wellness, learn, and relationships), logged my energy (grumpy/needy on 11/1 and feeling much more like myself on 11/2), and recorded the things I said no to. On Nov 1, I stopped watching a movie to go to the supermarket so I would have more healthy food for the week. Today, I was going to send something in addition to the information a colleague had requested. I realized the additional information was going to take at least 30 minutes to create, and my colleague might not find it useful. I will revisit it with them if they have questions.
