August Intention: Explore Assumptions
Earlier this month I ran our inaugural book salon where we created immunity x-rays from Kegan and Lahey's Immunity to Change. In the exercise, you identify a big goal, explore what you're doing instead, dig deep to uncover the fear driving your behavior, rewrite that fear as your hidden anxiety management commitment, and then list all the assumptions supporting your hidden commitment. See the book salon session summary for more on the exercise and experiments for testing assumptions.
It's a tough exercise that reveals assumptions we might not even realize we have.
Continuing the journey, this month we're exploring assumptions!
August Challenge: Question Your Daily Assumptions
Join our August Challenge by noticing assumptions you make each day, then questioning whether they're actually true.
Questioning Assumptions:
Notice the thought
Ask yourself: Is it true? Are there any circumstances when it’s not true?
Reflect on: Where did this assumption originate? How has it served you? What is the cost of maintaining it?
Experiment with: What small test can I do to get additional information about the validity of the assumption?
I'm writing this at the end of August 1st after barely sleeping due to a family member's ER visit. One of my assumptions was If I don't get enough sleep, I will spiral into a dark and sad place that is challenging to climb out of. This thought certainly didn’t make falling asleep any easier. While today was more challenging and I'm exhausted, I didn’t spiral into a deep sad place*.
There were, however, plenty of surprises throughout the day, such as being interrupted at 9:15 am, mid-coaching session, by a repair team that needed to turn off our power to make an emergency replacement of the electrical line. It seemed a perfect opportunity to reflect on my assumptions:
We would have electricity all day (generally a safe bet, until it wasn't)
The power would be out for longer than the promised 20 minutes
Switching my client from video on my computer to audio on my cell would be disruptive
It would be challenging to reconnect to the internet afterward
My reality check: The power was only out for 18 minutes. The internet came back instantly. Switching to cell was seamless, and I had five minutes to spare before my next meeting. I realized that my initial assumption projected a lot of negativity about what might happen. Instead, the experience was easier than expected, and I was able to approach it with levity, flexibility, and gratitude. Going forward, I will continue to plan and remember that flexibility, levity, and gratitude are powerful allies.
Ready to join the challenge? Use the tracking sheet below daily to record your assumptions and outcomes.
What assumptions are you ready to question this month?
*Update: Even a few days later, I’m still tired and noticing behaviors that come with it: second-guessing things, difficulty with recall, and seeing a little more of the negative at times than the positive. I realize that some of the behaviors are from not living in the present and worrying about what might be. Overall, not focusing on my fears helped and I feel more resilient.
